Of course, one conspiracy theory isn’t enough for folks nowadays, so there’s an EVEN MORE elaborate conspiracy theory out there as well! ![]() When I think of Illuminati membership, I don’t think of the biggest perk being “starring” in a late night infomercial. Well, if I was Boy George, or Elizabeth Hurley, I’d probably ask for my money back. Said to be forced to ‘eat pain’ in a quest to become more powerful.” My money is on the Pope to take the other two. It’s utterly bizarre to see everyone from Vladimir Putin to Barack Obama to The Pope sporting black eyes. Yes, you’re right, abstract snobby celebrity rich person I threw into there for comedic effect, you are very right. “After all, who wants to break a nail after that $5,000 manicure, am I right? Am I right?” We don’t have bodyguards, or secret service agents, and we don’t mingle with the rich and famous, who don’t exactly swim in dangerous circles of potential fisticuffs. I mean, think about the fact that we proletarians among the working class hoi paloi rarely see people walking around among us with black eyes, and we mix and mingle at places which could potentially afford us a much greater chance of encountering them. Which is incredibly strange, and even stranger the more you think about it. Heck, I trained in karate, boxing, tae kwan do, and muy thai kickboxing over the course of about about 20 years, and I didn’t even see that many folks with black eyes.Īnd yet, somehow, there’s been an epidemic of black eyes on celebrities and public figures over the past couple of years. Unless you’re a boxer, you train in MMA, or you run an underground fight club (damn! I wasn’t supposed to talk about that!), you probably don’t see many, if any, folks with black eyes running around. Just in general, how many people can you remember having black eyes in your life over the past year, two years, five years, ten years? ![]() How many people in the past year have you seen who have had black eyes? How many people do you know who currently have black eyes?
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